I've entered a 12 Step Plant Program. I didn't exactly enter it as much as my sister threw me into it. She's created the program herself and felt that I needed emergency intervention, or rather my plants needed a serious intervention.
Step One: Admitting you have a problem. Hello, my name is Rachel and I kill plants.
Step Two: Eliminate plants from your life. All of the plants in my home were surgically removed and sent to the garbage. I swear that they weren't all dead, or at least not completely dead. There were a few good leaves left.
Step Three: A plant-free home life. Maybe that is why I was so compelled to by the big flower pillow at IKEA- I knew I was going to be void of real plants. The flower pillow I can't 'love to death' as my sister accuses me of doing to my plants. Yes, I love my plants, but I don't love them to death, I really don't... and apparently I haven't gotten over denial.
Step Four: I have recently received approval to pass to step four. A supervised succulent at work. I'm allowed a succulent, it lives at my desk at work, and I'm only allowed to water it when I get approval from my sponsor (sister). It's a very happy plant that takes sunny vacations each weekend at my coworker Jonathan's desk, because it's closer to a window. My plant's name is Raoul- but I promise that naming your plants is completely normal. Unless it sends me back a step, then I'll reconsider.
If I'm sucessful at step four and move on to new steps, one day I'll live a happy life, free from dead plants.
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3 comments:
I am so glad you have joined me in using blogging as a tool to access theraputic needs. Good luck with the plant thing. By the way, one can always gage their success with the 12 step program by the sponsor they choose...its very telling. So they say.
Go Rachel!!! I am so proud of you! I am glad to see you are finally working through all the steps--just don't let Mich come to my house. ;)
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